i feel:

I feel very much alone in this world, but that’s how existentialism teaches me that I ought to be. I’ve come to realize through the years that there really is little out there in the world that seeks to truly benefit me or to guide me along. At times it’s a sinking feeling and I would like very much to go outside and to connect with everyone that I meet. Most unrealistic an ideal.

I’ll continue along alone for a while.